Do you ever feel sometimes that life is trying to tell you something?
This past year has been tough. After some twists and turns, I decided to just remove myself from things in my life that were making me miserable and take some time to do what I want. I've been completely selfish and it was necessary. My best friend reminded me recently that it is down to me to make myself happy and that is a very powerful thing to realise. She's so right. It is all down to me and me alone. But even though I know deep down which paths I need to take, it would be really bloody helpful if someone could just say, 'That is the right thing to do, well done Charlie, you win at life.'
The last few weeks I've had a lot of time to think and re-think and doubt and reassure, and as a result I feel like the world is giving me signs. Just to help me out, which is nice. You can read what you like into any song you hear on the radio, any horoscope you read or any leaflet handed to you by a bible-basher on the street. When my instinct is trying to tell me something, I guess it picks out items in my surroundings to hit my subconscious and drive a message home. Like making me take a detour in Christchurch to find a giant neon sign telling me exactly what I needed to hear:
Everything is going to be alright.
Whatever decisions I make, wherever life takes me next, it's all going to work out just fine. I actually feel the most positive I've felt in a very long time and it is god damn liberating! After months of travelling, I am, as this post goes live, on my way home to the UK. It's scary, it's exciting, it's sad. But everything is going to be alright.
(Edit: This article popped up on my Facebook feed as soon as I clicked 'publish on this post. It contains some fantastic quotes to help you if you're having a wobble about the future.)
I love you. I'm so excited to have you home. If it wasn't for that 'job' thing and the fact I will need to sleep, I'll be at the airport with banners. I might just make some to stick all over the house.
ReplyDeleteYou're so very brave and I am VERY proud of you xxx
Love this, I sometimes wish someone would just tell me what I'm meant to be doing but I guess only we can figure that out, ugh life! Safe trip home! x
ReplyDeleteI cannot wait to see your face. You did an awesome thing and I'm glad you did it. Everyone needs some me time it's so important x
ReplyDeleteI love this, especially as I'm in a bit of an uncertain place at the moment too. I got back to the UK from four months of travelling on Friday and even though it was an incredibly selfish (and probably pretty stupid) thing to do to give up my flat and job it's hands down the best decision I've ever made. So if it helps at all, you definitely did the right thing! Safe travels home!
ReplyDeletewww.moonandforest.co.uk
I've loved following your adventures, Charlie, and I've admired your courage and your bravery to confront the hard stuff; the stuff that the rest of us would run away from. Everything's going to be okay - and so many of us are here in digital land cheering you on. Lots of love. xxx
ReplyDeleteSO BLADY EXCITED TO CUDDLE YOU SOON. Welcome home small one! <3 so so proud of you and everything you've accomplished in the past few months. Onwards and upwards eh? :) xxxx
ReplyDeleteIMMA SQUEEZE YOU SO MUCH!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much, Jaime. We must make the digital land thing an IRL deal soon!
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Thanks Sarah, it's good to know there's someone else in the same position as me! I'm home safe and don't regret a thing. It's all new adventures from here!
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Can't wait to see you! I've had enough me time for now, now I need Emma time!
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We'll all figure it out eventually. I hope! Until then, there is cheese and plenty of it!
ReplyDeleteCx
Ha ha! Gary would love that! Thanks little one, I can't wait to see you!
ReplyDeleteCx