When I set off travelling for three months, my biggest fear was that I would spend the next 90+ days only having face-to-face communication with hostel receptionists and Starbucks employees. There is no rule book on how to make friends as an adult, and I had assumptions that everyone I'd meet would be of your bog-standard rucksack-with-flags-sewn-on, harem-pants-wearing, 'I'm spending six months in Thailand' variety that I basically have nothing at all in common with.
I remember discussing the fear of not making friends with my
actual friends before leaving, and all of them that had been travelling ensured me that it just kind of happened. What I didn't realise is that this was totally right because of one main thing: everyone you meet is in the same situation as you. Just like when I moved into university halls, I was surrounded by people who knew exactly what it felt like to be alone and eager to hang out with somebody. Anybody, in fact.
So, less terrifying than propping up at the bar and chatting up a stranger, here's my top tips on how to make friends when travelling along:
1) Book a tour
Whether it's a one day excursion or a two month multi-country jaunt, getting on a bus with other tourists is the perfect way to meet people. The driver or tour guide will inevitably ask people where they're from, and being British I'll pretty much always find another person from the UK to do the obligatory, 'Whereabouts are you from? Isn't it hot here?' conversation. When I spent two days alone in
Xi'an without hearing one word of English, my tour to the
Terracotta Warriors went a long way in perking me back up and making me feel human again.
2) Stay in a hostel
Honestly, if you're travelling alone, this is the best way to meet people. I've written my
top tips for staying in hostels, if you're new to them, but ultimately, staying in a dorm with other people who are normally travelling alone, is perfect. I was going to stay in a private room at my first hostel in
New Zealand, but opting to share with three other strangers meant I met two amazing women who I'm now fast friends with (one of which I've been to visit in
South Africa since!).
3) Share food
I don't mean just sitting next to someone in a restaurant and trying to share a dessert. If you're in a hostel and someone is cooking and can't find any salt, and you have some, offer to share it. If you're on a long tour, share your bus snacks with other weary travellers. My fellow travellers on a
Cape Winelands Tour bought a cheese platter and shared with all of us which basically secured my neverending love for them.
4) Offer tips
You'll find as a solo traveller that people are constantly swapping advice on where to go and what to do in various countries around the world. Some people may be pretentious with it, but most are just hugely enthusiastic and want to help, and if you do the same, people will be super grateful. On my first full day in
Kuala Lumpur, I met a girl on my tour to the
Batu Caves and said I'd heard
dinner at Jalan Alor market was a 'must-do'. She suggested we try it together and lo! I had a travel buddy for the next five days!
5) Get involved
It's likely that if you're travelling solo, you're looking for some sort of adventure, so getting involved in activities and opportunities probably isn't much of an ask. But in case you're feeling shy...well, don't. It might be offering to chip in on the washing up after your tour group have eaten together, or maybe, for some unknown reason, you'll fling yourself off the world's highest swing with a woman you've known for only three weeks (a post on that is coming up and ohmygod). Whatever it is, just do it.
I am so socially awkward I wish I had these tips when I travelled solo, instead i took up chain smoking and asked people if they had a lighter to strike up conversation.
ReplyDeleteTo be honest, smoking is a pretty good way of meeting people. Not a top tip necessarily, but I totally know what you mean!
ReplyDeleteCx
i adore this, such a great prompt for those who are a bit nervy. i hate people inherently, so i - like emma, am likely to try and avoid all human contact wherever possible.
ReplyDeleteThis is why I never manage to quit.
ReplyDeleteThat's what I tell myself, anyway...!
I didn't smoke the whole time I was in Australia but as soon as I was alone in New Zealand: BOOM!
ReplyDeleteYeah, trying to be a people person when I'm not a people person makes me even less of a people person. But I smash through it!
ReplyDeleteCx
Love this! I've just moved to a new city and the extent of my chat so far is with Starbucks baristas but hoping that weekends can be put to good use trying to make friends - it was so much easier as a kid! x
ReplyDeleteI know someone who had come back before Christmas after 5 months of travelling and he pretty much said the same things - you just click with people and it all flows from there!
ReplyDeleteI hope you're settling into Dubai life! Your photos look gorgeous and I'm sure you'll make loads of mates in no time!
ReplyDeleteCx
Yep, you can't really plan it, it just happens! But ultimately it's best to just join in and be friendly and the people will come!
ReplyDeleteCx
Thank You so much for this Charlie! I'm going away in August and am quite nervous about making friends but these tips are perfect for me, I think it'll be nerve-wracking going in but I just need to force myself to get involved and let things unravel!
ReplyDeleteJosieVictoriaa // Fashion, Travel & Lifestyle
Just remember to trust your instincts and if that means not trusting other people, so be it! You will always find people you don't like but more often than not you'll get on with everyone as you all have your travels in common. I'm sure you'll meet awesome people and you'll have such an amazing time! Where are you going?
ReplyDeleteCx
Yes exactly! I'm so excited, I'm heading off to Australia and hopefully popping over to New Zealand too!
ReplyDeleteDefinitely make time for New Zealand, it is honestly such a magical place, I'm sure you'll love it! Can't wait to see what you get up to, feel free to get in touch if you want any advice! I've only done Sydney, Melbourne & Tasmania in Australia, but I always have a great time when I visit.
ReplyDeleteCx